The Ben Affleck Wheel of Fortune

O, FORTUNA! Your capricious wheel of fate brings us mortals to greatest highs and most miserable lows as we rotate, ever onward, through the spinning machinations of time! And none among us has been raised by generous fortune to loftier highs, then brought to cruelest lows, than that mighty chin among men, the Batman-who-would-be-king, Ben Affleck. Affleck the Elder’s career carves the insistent, repetitive arc of a pendulum, with the trough accompanying some of the most irredeemable garbage cinema has ever seen.